time for overall reflection of the college life because i am not in math class like my schedule says i should be and i need a break from reading about childbirth (developmental psych, lol).
if i havent made it clear already, I LOVE UCSD and college life is agreeing with me considerably. i thought i would be much more homesick by now, but i'm not. only a little, and occasionally. now if only i could transport all my old friends here, life would be perfect. this is the perfect balance between summer and school. i feel like its summer still because i have minimal stress, except i have enough stuff to do to occupy me moderately. perfect. i can go out every night and hang out or whatever, and the workload doesnt get any worse. life is sweet. and i love meeting new ppl and soaking in the FALL weather (hah, silicon valley people, thats right, a season other than summer and rainy. jealous?) and everythings awesome and nice and rosy and stuffs.
perhaps i'm misjudging college because its only week two, but seriously this is way easier than mv. heck, this is easier than fifth grade. i am not kidding about that. except i already bombed my first math quiz but oh well its only a quiz. anyway. hope it gets harder otherwise im really going to stop trying.
already i'm forgetting what its like to live in sleepy cupertino. except la jolla is about as sleepy, except with more things going on (lol?).
how empty it is to do homework all day. like i did in mv, mostly. i dont even remember anything. tsktsk.
but really, cupertino seems like a dream to me now. sorry, cupertino ppl. i barely remember your colors now. the memory's getting fuzzier every day... warm and fuzzy! you still hold warm and fuzzy memories. :]
ok sd's nice and easy and all, but if i go premed, maybe i should pay more attention to class.... but on the other hand, if God wants me to go that way, i can fail college and still end up there. or should i be doing my part in obeying him by working harder?
BUT SERIOUSLY, GOD, PREMED???
part of me really wants to settle down as fast as possible, in a job and family. forget grad school.
part of me wants to hang around in school longer so i can mess around more and meet more ppl and have a longer time in this mission setting.
but going to med school is like moving to college all over again, and seriously, who knows where it's going to take me this time. i dont want to move around and leave friends every four years cuz thats lame. plus i hear horror stories of med school. but then, i heard horror stories of chem honors, and physics honors, and college, and all that too, and none of it was true.
so that means, if God wants me in med school, all i have to do is apply to one and ill get in, right? no competition? i should try that.
in fact, i think i will try that. my life is in a disarray already. i have no idea where it's going anymore. thats a little scary. back in hs, it was like, oh im going to college. now im in college and until a week ago, i was like oh im gonna get my teaching credentials and teach yay. now God's like messed everything up and shaken my world around and i have absolutely no idea where i will be four years from now. maybe in africa, that's as likely as california. but ok. its a little uncomfortable to not know, but i can deal with it. to infinity, and beyond. wherever that is.