today i dominated the discussion in hum section. i am beginning to think that i like hum section (i'm such a traitor to myself). we talk about some difficult passages and concepts (difficult meaning troubling) and i def do not know the answers and sometimes i dont even know what i think about it. but i can introduce ideas that maybe a nonchristian wouldnt think of, or ideas that maybe a nonchristian wouldnt have enough background to think of. there are many things that i would like to say to defend God and to give others a little clearer of a glimpse of the real God that i dont say, because i dont want to dominate the discussion and i dont want to appear to think i know it all because i dont. i will leave some of the revelation of God to God himself. in the meantime i find it very interesting to discuss the real God with nonchristians. sometimes you cant even talk about the real God to christians because they have a rosy picture of him being love love love all love. thats not the real God. the real God is holy holy holy. for the most part, the discussion paints an accurate picture of God, so in many ways i think these nonchristians are getting a better picture of God than many christians already think they have, because we read the bible and talk about the difficult stuff in section, stuff that sometimes christians are afraid to talk about because it doesnt fit our preconceptions of who God is, that christians are afraid to investigate because we're secretly afraid that if we dig too deep we'll find something that will break down our faith. and yes it will break down our faith in what we thought was God but really isnt. how come God destroys all the canaanites? thats not very fair or moral, they say. and no, its not very fair or moral. i dont think God is a fair or moral God, but so many christians do, and so many nonchristians have the same false idea, but this class is breaking those lies down. God is just. the bible never says he's fair, but he's just for sure. and you cannot put God under the same moral standards as humans because he's God and not just a human. he creates life so he has the right to destroy it as well. and so many christians never dig as deep as to figure this out because they think they know it all. but that pretty image they have in their heads of what they think is God is not the living God. this class also makes everyone aware that this God is not one that you can easily fathom. in many ways he doesnt make sense to us, and this class highlights it so well because everyone puzzles over the same questions and nobody has answers. and nobody should have all the answers or our God is a manmade god.
on the other hand, i am looking forward to the time when God's love is highlighted in this class as well. God might be holy holy holy, but let's not forget that he's love too. that shall be next quarter when we read the new testament. or possibly sooner?
mental playlist: hallelujah (tenth avenue north)